Sharknado 2: The Second One

Title: Sharknado 2: The Second One

Director: Anthony C. Ferrante

Year: 2014

Alright, the second one. Goodness. Sharknadovember is certainly a trip. I have to say, I actually enjoyed this movie more than I liked the first one. For starters, they clearly knew just how bad the first one was, and decided to make fun of it in the second one the entire time. There were also a million different cameos of relatively famous people throughout the movie, and I’m not quite sure how they managed to get so many. Here’s a quick list of some of them:

Billy Ray Cyrus

Daymond John

Biz Markie

Kelly Osbourne

Al Roker

Kelly Ripa

Michael Strahan

Will Wheaton

Again I ask: how?

I will answer with the tagline of this film:

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Shark happens.

Without further ado, let’s get ill with Sharknado 2 (that rhymed):

 

Characters

The categories are back: we have the people who have names that get eaten by sharks, and the people who have names that don’t get eaten by sharks. I’ll also throw in a death counter at the bottom to show you how many people got eaten (or crushed by the Statue of Liberty’s head).

 

The Ones Who Don’t Get Eaten

Fin Shepard – you know and love him from the first film: the guy who chainsawed his way out of a great white shark.

April Wexler – Fin’s ex-wife, but they’re back together. In this film, she’s now a renowned author who wrote a book titled How to Survive a Sharknado.

Martin – Fin’s brother-in-law and former best friend, except they make up and hug it out at the end.

Ellen – Fin’s sister, married to Martin.

There’s also Martin and Ellen’s son, Vaughn, and daughter, Mora, but they don’t do much in the movie, and they don’t get eaten, so don’t worry about them.

 

The Ones Who Do Get Eaten

Skye – Fin’s former high school classmate and ex-girlfriend. She’s a great lead woman. She doesn’t take crap from anyone.

And…well, basically anyone I didn’t mention in the last section gets eaten. And there’s a lot of names. Just know that if they aren’t on the list above, they’re probably swimming with the fishes (sorry not sorry).

Might as well break out the death counter…

Eaten by Sharks: 31 People

Crushed by The Statue of Liberty’s Head: 3 People

 

Summary

Sharknado 2 is basically the exact same story as the first one, except this time it’s in New York, the Sharknadoes are bigger, and the CGI is a whole lot better. We start the movie out on a plane, where Fin and April are flying from LA to New York to visit Fin’s sister and her family. Along the way, the plane runs into some bad weather, and Fin begins to have what he thinks are hallucinations. Every time he looks out the window of the plane, he sees sharks whipping through the air. Essentially, he has PTSD from the first Sharknado.

Before you know it, the storm outside of the plane gets worse (because of course it does, look at the title of the movie). Fin looks outside again, and this time there are a LOT more sharks swirling about. Some of the other passengers notice the strange happenings outside, and start to comment on it. Then, a lone shark makes its way into one of the engines of the plane, causing it to burst into flames. The plane starts to lose altitude, and soon everyone is panicking. A part of the plane is ripped off, and sharks begin to make their way into the plane, eating one, two, three, four, FIVE people, including the pilot and the co-pilot. So now the plane has no one flying it, but Fin decides that he should give it a shot (even though his son was the one in flight school. Shouldn’t he be here? That would’ve made more sense for him to fly the plane. But nooooo, good ol’ Fin can do that). April tries to make her way to the cockpit as well, and is almost sucked out of the plane but she manages to grab on to a seatbelt and hold on. An air marshal tosses April his gun so that she can defend herself, but it is all for naught as a great white shark flies by and bites her hand off. It’s just not a sequel if someone’s hand doesn’t come off (looking at you, Star Wars). Fin manages to put down the landing gear, and very roughly lands the plane, but besides the five people who turned into shark chum, everyone on board is safe.

AND THAT’S JUST THE FIRST 10 MINUTES.

Did you know that this film has its own theme song? Here, let me introduce the two of you:

Please make it end. I’m sure I’ll wake up tonight with this song stuck in my head.

The scene opens up to Martin, Ellen, and their children. Ellen is taking Mora to the Statue of Liberty to meet some friends, and Martin is taking Vaughn to meet up with Skye at a Mets game. The family splits up and go to their separate events. As Ellen and Mora show up at the Statue of Liberty, Mora’s friends tell her about the plane that just crash landed at JFK.

Back at the airport, Fin is trying to warn everyone that a sharknado is on its way to hit New York, but no one takes him seriously (just wait, they’re in for a surprise). Fin is finally able to get April to a hospital so she can have surgery. Luckily, she survives, because in movies, no one ever dies from a missing hand. Fin calls ahead to Ellen and tells her that she must get to the top of Bales Tower Hotel in Manhattan as soon as possible. Ellen then tells Fin that Martin and Vaughn are at the ballpark, so Fin grabs a cab and heads for Citi Field.

Once there, Fin rushes in and runs into Skye along the way. Immediately, the audience can tell Skye totally has a thing for Fin, and our suspicion is confirmed when she leans in and kisses him (if you recall the first movie, Fin had a different woman (Nova) that was interested in him that wasn’t his wife. I sense a trend here…). Fin tells Skye that he’s back together with April, much to her disappointment, and the two run off to grab Martin and Vaughn. By now, the rain has started and sharks begin falling from the sky, eating several people in the process. Fin and Skye find the others, and then run to the exit, grabbing some baseball bats along the way. Oh, and some random guy, played by Richard Kind (that guy you’ve definitely seen in other movies, but don’t remember his name), knocks a shark clear across the baseball field and into the glowing “Citi” sign across the way. What? What happened to physics? This man cannot be that strong, and even if he really could swing that hard, the bat he used would probably be snapped in half! But there’s no questioning the Sharknado, no, because there are no rules.The gang makes it to the subway, but we don’t get to find out what happens next just yet.

The scene shifts back to Ellen and Mora on the ferry ride back from Ellis Island, and unfortunately, one of Mora’s friends gets eaten (rather brutally) by a shark. Once they get back on land, the Statue of Liberty’s head is ripped off in the storm and sent flying towards the remaining three women. They manage to run away from it Indiana Jones-style, and all of them survive, except three other people get crushed by our lovely Lady Liberty’s head.

Back in the subway, Fin, Martin, Skye, and Vaughn fight off sharks that have flooded into the subway. Everyone survives, and they make their way to a cab. Amazingly enough, it’s the same guy that drove Fin around earlier! Fin tells the cabbie to drive them to a place where they can find weapons and the ingredients to make make-shift bombs. If you remember from the first movie, you can get rid of a sharknado by blowing it up. I say that as if they don’t have an explanation for why blowing it up works, but they do. It has something to do with the fact that a tornado is comprised of hot and cold air and the explosion offsets the balance between the two temperatures and destroys the tornado blah blah blah doesn’t really matter. I think the writing team just needed a way to destroy the sharknados, and bombs always are the answer.

As the team finds a medieval sword and make-shift bomb supplies, they start heading to Bales Tower. Along the way, the flood waters become so bad that they almost completely cover up the taxi cab. The group gets out through the windows and stands on top of the car. Fin creates a rope swing (with some rope that the cabbie happened to have) and everyone swings across to safety…that is, until the cabbie swings and ends up getting eaten by sharks. Fin is the last one who must find a way across, and he finds one: jump on top of the sharks’ heads. Yes. Like a game of Frogger. Once he makes it to the other side, he and Martin have, in my opinion, the best conversation of the entire movie:

Martin: “Do you know what you just did?”

Fin: “Don’t say it.”

Martin: “You jumped the shark.”

Beautiful. Script writing at its best.

After the group makes it to Bales Tower, Skye and Fin head up to the roof to attempt throwing their bombs into the sharknadoes. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work, because these sharknadoes are too cold and the bomb’s heat is not enough to equalize it (no, it doesn’t make sense to me either. Just go with it). A few sharks fly off of the main sharknado after one of the bombs hits, and HOLY CRAP THE SHARKS BURST INTO FLAME THAT’S A FLYING SHARK ON FIRE, so Fin and Skye decide to book it out of there. Smart idea, guys. They meet up with Martin, Ellen, and the kids and flee out of a fire escape.

Remember how April is a character in the movie? Back at the hospital, April escapes from the ICU with her now stump of a hand and manages to steal a fire truck to go find Fin. Somehow, she shows up right as Fin and the others run out of Bales Tower. At this point, the sharknadoes have begun travelling straight towards the Empire State Building. If the storms combine, it would create a mega sharknado, which Al Roker (playing himself on the Today Show) states would be “a storm of Biblical proportion,” which translates to “pretty frickin’ big.”

Once again, Skye and Fin are the ones to go to the top of the building to try and stop the sharknadoes. Fin plans to blow up a tank of Freon at the top of the building by using the lightning rod to produce enough power. As Fin and Skye start to put the plan into motion, April shows up to help out. In the place of where her hand used to be, April has attached a circular saw. Y’know, just in case she wants to do some wood crafting. As the storm rages, Fin connects a cable from the lightning rod to the Freon tank. Skye sacrifices herself to help hold the connection in place, and as lightning strikes the building, the Freon tanks explode, sending Fin and Skye flying into the air. Fin’s plan works, and the sharknadoes begins to disappear.

In the air, Skye gets bit in half by a shark (what a shame). Fin manages to grab a chain flying in the air, throws it around the mouth of a great white shark, and RIDES the shark, impaling it on the Empire State Building’s antenna. Here’s picture proof that this is a thing that happens:

use-this-one

Fin and April reunite on the top of the building, Fin reaches down inside of a dead shark, and PULLS OUT APRIL’S HAND, which still had her wedding ring on it.

THEY ACTUALLY RECYCLED THIS STUNT.

FIN MAGICALLY PULLS NOVA OUT OF A SHARK IN THE FIRST ONE WHEN SHE GOT EATEN BY A RANDOM ONE LIKE 10 MINUTES PREVIOUSLY.

NOW HE SOMEHOW FINDS THE SHARK THAT BIT HIS WIFE’S HAND OFF AT THE BEGINNING OF THE MOVIE.

LIKE I SAID.

NO RULES.

Anyway, Fin gets down on one knee, and proposes to April once more, she says yes, and we get a happy ending.

 

Because the first Sharknado didn’t have anything to go off of being a new, albeit bad, idea, it was pretty much bad for the sake of being bad. Sharknado 2 on the other hand, had the first film to build on, so this time around we knew that there were things that wouldn’t make sense. We knew that there were going to be consistency errors all around. We knew that there weren’t any rules. And that’s what made this movie better. To be fair, it has two stars on Netflix, compared to Sharknado which has one. In my opinion, it earned that extra star. Good job team.

Score:

3 Statue of Liberty deaths out of 31 shark deaths

 

One more Sharknado movie to go…Happy Sharknadovember.

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